I want to cry, but I can't I don't know why...

Here, feels so sick, painful... and really suffer a lot of pain.

Sigh~

None of them said that I'm bothering them.. even I feel really like that. I'm bothering their life, even when they said I am not, but at the end, should I give u the worst evidence to show you that I am the one who will crush your life into the lowest level? Should I?

Sigh~

^^ This kinda pity but really, for sure, It must be fun and not like this...

Today's schedule must be finish my comic (half) and study for my entrance test... Sigh~ but really my heart is not strong enough for works... Looks like I'd remembered into my past memories just like... how I spent holidays in the morning... and how the people I love very much, being hated by many of my friends.. And also by myself now...

This pain took deep scratch..I closed my eyes, hopes I'll no more longer feel it, but when I close my eyes... I feel I want to cry on my deep platform inside of my heart. Hopes this kind of pain will disappear, and I'll forget about anything that I ever spent together.. That I ever done together... Cry together, laugh, mad... and many more... I wish I never spent that time together, so I will never realize and regret about it...

When my face became sad... there's one who take care of me, he said he will never let me go, or just being taken of him... He said he will protect me... But deep inside, I was so happy that there's someone still look at me.. told so honest... But there's something inside, that I can't accept all of his kindness..

This feeling, this platform still chained by a rusty rope... That I realize I still can't opened that seal for another person, for another chance ... That I still never want t other step inside... Just for the one that passed away...I wish that I never hide myself into the darkness.. Into the bitter air that I breath on... I'm holding this inside, without any tears come out..